I am emotionally drained.
Physically and emotionally.
Done with bullshit.
Done with bullshit people.
Done with bullshit situations.
Done with my Death Cab for Cutie listening party.
There are a million of things I should be doing.
Uploading, working on BCS, and saving money. Instead of doing any of the for mentioned things I am currently on blogger and online shopping. Maybe I just need to release some tension and write out my feelings. So I'm giving myself a two week break before I go back to BCS. I just need to write, breathe, and focus on things I need to be doing. Before I know it, it'll be November and away I'll be in another country. It couldn't come at the most perfect time. We all just need a little escape to clear our minds right?
With everything that's happened in the past couple of weeks I just don't know what to feel anymore. It's weird to say that death has a way of making you think about your life. Instead of focusing of all the things I should be doing, I've been focusing on all the things I shouldn't be doing.
I should be doing rewrites
Instead of writing on blogger
I should be editing photos for Broke City Style
Instead I'm watching this hot mess of a game.
I should be writing posts for Broke City Style
Instead I'm writing about things I should be doing and watching this FUCKING HOT MESS OF A GAME!
I should be saving money
Instead of spending before I get it. (WE ALL SELF CONCIOUS I'M JUST THE FIRST TO ADMIT IT)
Here's the thing. It's going to all change. I'm going to finally grieve my nephews death, I'm going to watch a shit load of baseball, I'm going to watch a shit load of great films, and I'm going to focus on just getting my life in order. I've been in such a busy nonstop mood that I haven't had a chance to catch my breath on anything. Instead I'm making up stories on a million different ideas and I can't even begin to write the first verse.
I just need a few nights alone with my headphones and some great tunes. Cry it out and just get everything together.
Also I forgot that SMASH covered "Some Boys" by Death Cab For Cutie. So of course I can't stop listening to it. I couldn't listen to this song for the longest time. Now I hear it and it's like the first time. <3 Beautiful.
If you haven't watched SMASH, I urge you to watch it.