Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Status - Single...

This is probably going to get me in a whole shit loads of trouble.

Lately I just can’t get over the number of relationships I see people in. I am in no shape or form jealous of that because for the people I truly care about I see how genuinely happy they are to be in a relationship not to mention how grotesquely in love they are; but for the rest of the masses it boggles my mind how people have this fear to be single. It is really still taboo to be single? How hard is it really to jump from a long term relationship into singlehood?

Obviously I have never been in a relationship. Most of what I have to say is extremely one sided but it's hard for me to understand how a person can't just be single. Relationships that I've seen I wonder how much does a person has to endure until they reach their breaking point. Perfectly strong willed people become lovestoned for love. They do the complete opposite of their character and all for the sake of keeping a sinking ship relationship. They'll spend years in a loveless relationship without anything to show for it, thinking they'll get married, thinking they'll have children and 7 years pass and you're left with a beaten down soul, insecurity and nothing more then a bond of "I used to love you" feeling. Breaking up isn't an option. You're so afraid of being alone because a relationship is all that you remember, your relationship became your identity.

Whats wrong with being single? You were born single! The day girls stopped playing with barbies they want to be in a relationship. Who can blame them. The film and music industry don't help being single with the songs about love, heartache and firsts it's no wonder everyone has a warped idea of what love is. Love happens, it exists just not in the sense that we were brought up thinking. When you love someone you know in an instant but the things people do for love is completely batshit crazy. There's nothing wrong with being single. If you can take care of your own core responsibilities as an adult then you can take care of yourself. You don't need someone else to be there to hold your hand. If you think that you do then maybe you should reevaluate everything in your life and wonder why is it that you need that person. Is the comfort of having someone close better than having no one?

It is easier for me to move on from people I've been in love with because I've never spent the years and time that these relationships had been in. Perhaps I would go in the same fate as the others but at the same time I wonder do individuals not value their worth? I know I'm good enough for love, I know exactly what I want and how I would love to be loved but is that enough for a relationship? There is so many factors that go into relationships. Feelings, consideration, teamwork, understanding, respect, trust but once any of those are broken it takes much longer for it to be repaired. Still people stay in unhealthy relationships not because they love this person but because they're afraid of being alone.

Then theres the people that are in relationships not because they fell in love, but the fear of being alone. Almost like a last resort. Marriages now a days are based not on love but more in the sense of having respect for a person and a mutual understanding. How can you be in a marriage if you don't love a person? You can't grow to love a person, you know the first 5 minutes of being with someone if you love them it's not just a waiting game of "oh in a month I'll be in love with you". So many young people rush into marriage, rush into love because it's all they've ever seen in movies, in society, in people. All I have to say is before you rush into any relationship find how much you love about yourself and then when love actually comes and finds you (and it does) see where your head is at. Please don't put someone else's feelings on the line only on a maybe love thing. It's not fair to the other person. There is someone out there that is wanting to love that person the way that person loves you. How could you deny someone the feelings that you want for yourself?

There are so many wonderfully, beautiful, fabulous single people and they're doing amazing things. They're still hopeful for love, relationships and all that gushy stuff; it surprises me how they remain single and people who are not worthy of relationships are not. I know it's selfish but I see the longing in peoples eyes to share their time with someone but they like myself will not settle for just anyone. It's not that they think they're better but they know when they're in love they will be loved. Who can blame them? I would rather feel that sensation then settle for just anybody.

I guess in all reality. I want to be loved. I want every aspect of it. The butterflies, the sickness worse than the flu but I refuse to settle for anything less than butterflies. I know someone out there feels the same way I do and when I find that person I will never let go.

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